Sunday, December 11, 2016
Lower expectations
Men have significant high expectations we need to deliver to the ecosystems we live in.
Dads are expected to do "dad stuff". If only that included routinely wearing a princess dress and tiara to go to a tea party along with Mr and Mrs Bear. My wife doesn't think the kids should know about this part of me. How will I hide the dozens of pairs of shoes, or neatly hung dresses, or drawer full of bras and pantyhose from inquiring mind who expect a truthful dad.
Husbands are expected to provide a strong shoulder to their wives, supporting them in adventures and perils, calming their fashion anxieties. Who will support my occasional displeasure at wearing a shirt and tie, and readily encourage me to just wear anything when I change for the last time into a pretty dress, matching heels, and coordinated purse.
Role models are expected to provide stable models to impressionable minds. Why not also show the true, wavy mind that struggles with identity, fitting in, and social acceptance even at a mature age.
As crossdressers, we lower our expectations of acceptance as we try to survive and avoid disruption to others and their high expectations.
Sunday, November 20, 2016
Wearing a bra to bed
Seems like there are two reasons to wear a bra to bed, either to sleep in it or for other adventures instead of sleeping.
Women seem to look for the first opportunity to take off their bra at home, and don’t seem to like the idea of going to sleep with their bra on.
I’ve tried sleeping with a padded underwire bra on and found that it took some getting used to turning from side to side, though I did like the lines it created on my skin when I took it off the next morning. Sleeping on my chest was a bit uncomfortable and ran the risk of indenting my cute bra cups. Lastly, the lace on some bras seems so delicate that it might rip if snagged when turning from side to side.
Sports bras are much more comfortable for sleeping in, jus watch out for them being too tight or affecting your circulation. Sleep bras (mostly cloth, no support, no underwire, no padding) are probably the best bra for sleeping in. They keep the chest in place, yet aren’t uncomfortable.
But for us who only sleep in a bra occasionally, it’s still a fun experience!
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| Photo credit: hiddencage via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND |
Women seem to look for the first opportunity to take off their bra at home, and don’t seem to like the idea of going to sleep with their bra on.
I’ve tried sleeping with a padded underwire bra on and found that it took some getting used to turning from side to side, though I did like the lines it created on my skin when I took it off the next morning. Sleeping on my chest was a bit uncomfortable and ran the risk of indenting my cute bra cups. Lastly, the lace on some bras seems so delicate that it might rip if snagged when turning from side to side.
Sports bras are much more comfortable for sleeping in, jus watch out for them being too tight or affecting your circulation. Sleep bras (mostly cloth, no support, no underwire, no padding) are probably the best bra for sleeping in. They keep the chest in place, yet aren’t uncomfortable.
But for us who only sleep in a bra occasionally, it’s still a fun experience!
Sunday, November 6, 2016
Real men wear sports bras
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| Photo credit: Ahnubis via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND |
Real men wear sports bras. Sports bras support the chest and back, keeping the upper body snug. Extremely comfortable and lightweight, yet durable and protective. Comfortable enough to sleep in, subtle enough to wear in guy mode.
Workout clothes seem to be one area the guys closet is borrowing more from women, with more feminine-cut tank tops, trendy pink sports shoes, compression runner's tights. I hope sports bras make that crossover someday so that guys all over can experience such comfort.
Wednesday, November 2, 2016
Retail Therapy
One more post I wrote on crossdresserheaven.com
The daily struggle living life as a secret crossdresser can be stressful and depressing.
Just like many normal women, wearing stylish heels or cute flats in guy mode, I’ve found retail therapy!
There’s something relaxing about spending an hour before work or at lunch openly trying on heels at my favorite shoestore, browsing the clearance dress rack in a dept store, taking a long walk wearing flats, confidently looking through racks of cute used outfits.
Seeing so many other attractive women shopping, noticing their different outfits, and admiring their flats, heels, sandals, and wedges. Finally, complimenting women on styles I like.
It all feels so normal.
Then back to work or life, back into guy shoes, back to surviving as crossdresser trying to balance it all.
The daily struggle living life as a secret crossdresser can be stressful and depressing.
Just like many normal women, wearing stylish heels or cute flats in guy mode, I’ve found retail therapy!
There’s something relaxing about spending an hour before work or at lunch openly trying on heels at my favorite shoestore, browsing the clearance dress rack in a dept store, taking a long walk wearing flats, confidently looking through racks of cute used outfits.
Seeing so many other attractive women shopping, noticing their different outfits, and admiring their flats, heels, sandals, and wedges. Finally, complimenting women on styles I like.
It all feels so normal.
Then back to work or life, back into guy shoes, back to surviving as crossdresser trying to balance it all.
I am that b***ch
Another post I wrote on crossdresserheaven.com...
I am that b***ch, the one her husband keeps thinking about with the tall, shapely body, protruding breasts, slender legs made for stilettos, and a personality that seems to make friends with anyone.
I am that secretive woman whom he spends time with sharing his deepest fears and desires, while making up stories why he’s late.
I am that seductive mistress who sneaks into his house late at night, wearing short dresses he can’t keep his hands off.
I am that mysterious girl that intrigues him, hiding online while he spends hours trying to learn more about.
I am that alluring beauty that he obsessivey shops for, always searching for the perfect outfit for, then hides countless gifts of shoes, dresses, purses, lingerie in the back of his closet.
I am that wh***e who gives him pleasure in ways she can’t, who takes him to heights he’s never been to, who creatively keeps him craving for more.
I am her husband, the husband of an amazing woman who deserves better, the husband whose crossdressing secret crushes her, the husband she could never support with his crossdressing, the husband who struggles to find the right path.
I am that b***ch, the one her husband keeps thinking about with the tall, shapely body, protruding breasts, slender legs made for stilettos, and a personality that seems to make friends with anyone.
I am that secretive woman whom he spends time with sharing his deepest fears and desires, while making up stories why he’s late.
I am that seductive mistress who sneaks into his house late at night, wearing short dresses he can’t keep his hands off.
I am that mysterious girl that intrigues him, hiding online while he spends hours trying to learn more about.
I am that alluring beauty that he obsessivey shops for, always searching for the perfect outfit for, then hides countless gifts of shoes, dresses, purses, lingerie in the back of his closet.
I am that wh***e who gives him pleasure in ways she can’t, who takes him to heights he’s never been to, who creatively keeps him craving for more.
I am her husband, the husband of an amazing woman who deserves better, the husband whose crossdressing secret crushes her, the husband she could never support with his crossdressing, the husband who struggles to find the right path.
Happy Crossdresser Day
Sharing a post I wrote on crossdressheaven.com...
Happy Crossdresser Day….so many times I’ve wanted to say that today instead of Happy Halloween.
For many of us crossdressers, today has such a special meaning, it’s a day we’ve used as an excuse to try to test the social waters around us to feel the temperature of acceptance, or it’s a day we’ve tried going out dressed up and hid among the other costumes, or it’s the day we dream of being ourselves, or it’s the day we find wigs, fake nails, cheap makeup, size 10-13 heels, fishnet stockings, kinky outfits appear in stores everywhere. There are the discounts too the day after.
For me, Halloween has so many crossdresser memories. Years ago, a few weeks before the day, I bought a pair of heels, borrowed (without asking) an old dress of my wife’s, borrowed her tights, put everything on and showed her my “going as a girl” outfit. It almost sounded plausible except for my wife suspicious wondering why I didn’t want to go dressed to work like that for Halloween, or why exactly had I bought a pair of women’s shoes and when was I going to return them to the store. Then, weeks later, her wondering why I hadn’t returned the heels back to the store.
A few years ago, I had the audacity to wear women’s clothes out, sort of blending into guys clothes, while running errands on the day. Unexpectedly, I ran into a couple of female friends and tried hard to conceal the feminine highlights on my jeans pockets. One of them seemed a bit perplexed as she gave me one of those tight, feel up my back hugs, where I’m sure she felt my padded bra push up against hers, or her hand waved over my bra strap/closure being felt through my shirt. She did smile, but has never made any mention of her suspicion.
Then, there’s the yearly ritual that maybe this will be the year that I surprise coworkers and family with a realistic feminine outfit, only to shyly retreat back into the closet and just wear drab as I silently protest a holiday in which men wearing women’s clothes brings many unexpected remarks, from applause for the comedy, to admiration of the fashion choices, to amazement over balancing in heels, to crude remarks from jock-type guys.
It’s almost over, hope your Halloween or Crossdresser Day went as well as you expected!
Happy Crossdresser Day….so many times I’ve wanted to say that today instead of Happy Halloween.
For many of us crossdressers, today has such a special meaning, it’s a day we’ve used as an excuse to try to test the social waters around us to feel the temperature of acceptance, or it’s a day we’ve tried going out dressed up and hid among the other costumes, or it’s the day we dream of being ourselves, or it’s the day we find wigs, fake nails, cheap makeup, size 10-13 heels, fishnet stockings, kinky outfits appear in stores everywhere. There are the discounts too the day after.
For me, Halloween has so many crossdresser memories. Years ago, a few weeks before the day, I bought a pair of heels, borrowed (without asking) an old dress of my wife’s, borrowed her tights, put everything on and showed her my “going as a girl” outfit. It almost sounded plausible except for my wife suspicious wondering why I didn’t want to go dressed to work like that for Halloween, or why exactly had I bought a pair of women’s shoes and when was I going to return them to the store. Then, weeks later, her wondering why I hadn’t returned the heels back to the store.
A few years ago, I had the audacity to wear women’s clothes out, sort of blending into guys clothes, while running errands on the day. Unexpectedly, I ran into a couple of female friends and tried hard to conceal the feminine highlights on my jeans pockets. One of them seemed a bit perplexed as she gave me one of those tight, feel up my back hugs, where I’m sure she felt my padded bra push up against hers, or her hand waved over my bra strap/closure being felt through my shirt. She did smile, but has never made any mention of her suspicion.
Then, there’s the yearly ritual that maybe this will be the year that I surprise coworkers and family with a realistic feminine outfit, only to shyly retreat back into the closet and just wear drab as I silently protest a holiday in which men wearing women’s clothes brings many unexpected remarks, from applause for the comedy, to admiration of the fashion choices, to amazement over balancing in heels, to crude remarks from jock-type guys.
It’s almost over, hope your Halloween or Crossdresser Day went as well as you expected!
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| Photo credit: lavishlylush via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-SA |
Friday, October 7, 2016
The Perfect Dress
A few days ago, I came across a beautiful photo of a crossdresser wearing a evening dress, an evening dress with a princess cut. I've never been lucky to find an evening dress that fit me well, so I didn't think much more about it.
Yesterday, while shopping at one of my favorite thrift stores, a brand new, with tags, evening dress popped out at me, literally. Expecting the usual, too small, too short, not flaterring, why, where will I wear it, I decided to try it on anyway with a pair of sparkly heels. I slipped on the dress, the zip actually closed all the way, a first. Then I looked in the mirror.
The dress was perfect. Gasp, shocked, I saw a beautiful person wearing the most amazing dress. It took me a few seconds to accept that the reflection was really me. The dress, a long, flowing chiffon dress with a satin underlay, gave my masculine body such a feminine look with its princess cut. The built-in bra cups fit perfectly over my breasts, giving them some lift to create accenting cleavage. The neck line, with embellishment, distracted away any odd guy parts. And my arms and back looked sexily bare in the cross back neckline. I have bought many dresses over the years, mostly cute cocktail dresses and a few odd evening dresses. This dress is the first evening dress that truly made me feel like a princess, it is the perfect dress.
Yesterday, while shopping at one of my favorite thrift stores, a brand new, with tags, evening dress popped out at me, literally. Expecting the usual, too small, too short, not flaterring, why, where will I wear it, I decided to try it on anyway with a pair of sparkly heels. I slipped on the dress, the zip actually closed all the way, a first. Then I looked in the mirror.
The dress was perfect. Gasp, shocked, I saw a beautiful person wearing the most amazing dress. It took me a few seconds to accept that the reflection was really me. The dress, a long, flowing chiffon dress with a satin underlay, gave my masculine body such a feminine look with its princess cut. The built-in bra cups fit perfectly over my breasts, giving them some lift to create accenting cleavage. The neck line, with embellishment, distracted away any odd guy parts. And my arms and back looked sexily bare in the cross back neckline. I have bought many dresses over the years, mostly cute cocktail dresses and a few odd evening dresses. This dress is the first evening dress that truly made me feel like a princess, it is the perfect dress.
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| Photo credit: Leopold.Terence via Foter.com / CC BY-SA |
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