Every month, I have a cycle....no, not that ultra feminine one of discomfort. Most weeks, I crossdress several times a week, sometimes just at home, sometimes out running errands. One week each month, I have this intense, unexplainable desire to show that "once again, our favorite crossdress ventures out into the world". This desire to make sure the world knows my secret, or at least a few people whom I don't really know, but I'm sure recognize me from shopping in their stores.
Every month, during that same week, I mentally try to reason that there is nothing "wrong" with what I do, I want to be accepted, I deserve to be accepted, I want my spouse to know more about my dressing, I want my friends and family to know the real me. At home, I drop hints, leaving a pair of flats out in a noticeable place, delicates hanging to dry, a special drawer left open, jewelry sitting on the dresser. If anyone at home sees these hints, nobody says anything.
Every month, I find that week a test of restraint. I can confidently crossdress and go out when I'm on my own, avoiding places where I might run into friends or family. With family and friends, I wish I could talk to them about the real me to avoid them feeling like my crossdressing is being forced onto them. Then that week ends, and I'm back to enjoying the status quo of being a closeted crossdresser.
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